This is a story about possession and madness. Its about mindcontrol within the New Age movement.
When I was 17 I experienced an out of body travel. This gave me an “awakening” to spiritual things and I started to read alot to find answers to what had happened to me. I went to the bookstores and read everything I could find about the occult, esoteric, new age, meditation etc. There was one book that I found when I was around 19 that was a new age book about ascended masters and how to develop the third eye and develop on a spiritual path.
This book changed my life. Not in a good way but in a very dark and evil way. I started to do a mantra that was described in the book that was to open the third eye. You were supposed to see an aura in front of your eyes after a couple of weeks of doing the mantra and yes I saw colors infront of my open eyes almost immediately after doing the mantra. I did do the mantra for some time but also other meditations from other books for different purposes. It took some years before my life started to turn really bad and that was after I met a women that was connected to the writer of this book. About 2 years later I met this woman holding lectures in “mental training” when I was looking for work right after military service. I saw that this womans name was in the the beginning of the book. She had written a poem that was in front of the first chapter. (I think only in the first edition of this book but cant be sure). I later ended up in therapy sessions in this womans house and I asked her if she knew Alexander Markus (the writer of the book) and she said they had met during a hypnosis course they had taken tougheter.
Is this the same woman? Translator of a book from english to swedish called “serpent and the rainbow” by Wade Davis
This woman is not a public figure but has been mentioned in local news about a girl who has been raped by her father and she was there trying to bring back suppressed memories in the girl. (And this is where I later get suspicous about this woman handling cases of rape and abuse.) This is about the time when my life started to turn very very bad. I got a new job and at the same time a girl started there and I ended up falling in love. At the same time I fell in love she ended up with another guy and I got some real pain in my heart and I turned depressed and very mentaly bad. I also started to get very sexually tormented in my head. After this girl dissapeared from my life I was still very depressed and this is when this woman started to contact me “mentally” in the form of a voice saying I should contact her for help. I ended up calling her and this is when i ended up in therapy at this womans house. This was just normal therapy sessions but I ended up quiting there after some time and did not want to return. This is also the time when I started to experience more and more supernatural things. I started to hear more and more voices in the head and I experienced what you can call strong “thoughtforms” that were sexual in a way like sleeping with an invisible girl. I experienced this as some form of sexual rape that was only spiritual and not physical. I was also more and more sexually tormented in my head in a way that I could not find any real girls but was very isolated and mentally locked down. This is where the real torture began. I started to get real agressive. Several times a week a got outbreaks of anger. These anger outbreaks coincided with sexual torment in my head. After some time I got into self hurts. It started when the aggresion came about after intense inner sexual toment and then I also started to hit myself in the head. The voices in the head came more intense and most of them was about punishment. I also got very hard head twists (my head would go from one side and fast back resulting in a headach after some time). These agressive outbreaks with self hurts happened several times a week but the voices were never quiet. This was also when this woman came into my head in the form of voices och images. All the voices came with the belief system of the book. A new age system of beliefs that all my “hard” treatment was a kind of purification process to be free from emotions and negativity from the past (and even past lifetimes) and to be free from the wheel of rebirth and become a master of life. This was all intense mindcontrol. The more I “resisted” the “treatment” the more punished I became. This torture went on for years and it was all designed to break me. I think I was around 23-24 when the voices started and was followed by the aggression and head hits some time after that and it lasted to what I think was some years over 30. I also experinced more and different kinds of punishments over time. My body would be changed in varies ways. Some kind of mutations. I could see my fathers hands and head overshadowing my hands and head. This was real physical changes. This was part of the torture to break me and caused a lot of hurt for me both emotionally and mentally. I also very often experienced that my life was controlled by black magic. Maybe a form of paranioa but I dont think there is a coincidence witch persons I meet in life. How did I meet this woman that was connected to the book in the first place? There were more connections around me that caused me sexual and emotional hurts. I would meet girls that would later hurt me. It was almost like someone was playing with my life and I was a puppet controlled by a puppetmaster. All these hurts around me also caust me to become more agressive but all it did was me hurting myself more and more. The agression was always turned towards myself and I never became aggresive or violent towards anyone around me. I also experienced sexual excitement and was forced to masterbate. This was nothing natural. I could walk by a girl on the street and when I came home later I would get some “spell” upon me with sexual excitement over this girl that I had never seen before. This was all some sort of game with my life. Punishment and reward. I had stayed away from this woman in the real life for over 5 years but she was still in my head in the form of voices and images directing me (by force) on a form of “spiritual path”.
When I was some years over 30 I experienced a form of “upgrade” from the book. I was visited by “Johannes” also called Johnny lovewisdom. He came in a “spriritual” form and was talking to me in a form of “telepathy?”. He was dead in the physical world the year 2000 but was still “teaching” in the spititual. He was in his reincarnations known as John the Baptist and Milarepa etc. He was also the spiritual master of Alexander Markus (the author of the book)
“Johnny Lovewisdom was connected to the Windish family and Walter Siegmeister. Siegmeister wanted to create a super-race who worshiped the sun. He was a proponent of the hollow earth concept and UFOs. Lovewisdom was also into creating a domesday cult in that they wanted to build a safe place from radioactive fallout.”
This was also the beginning of alot of “wisdom” masters that apeared in my life (only in the spirit) the following years. They were taking my “spiritual teachings” and experiences to a new level. During this time some of the torture I was under calmed down and I stopped with punshing my self in the head and the head twists also stopped. They were stopped by the “spiritual masters” that appered in my head. What was not ending was the extreme agression and sexual assault and the voices in the head was more turned towards a 24 hours communication with “ascended masters” instead. The agression was still explained as some sort of spiritual cleansing from pasts negativity (mindcontrol). This communication with these “spiritual masters” was something that lasted for almost 15 years until I was 44 years old. I can write a whole book about my daily experiences that occurred in my head during this time. There arrived after some years after the first “Johannes” alot of more wisdom masters. I think I had them all in my head. Plato, Pyhtagoras, Thoot, a guy in a small spaceship from Sirius. I even had aliens from Zeta Reticuli that came from portals from there own planet. They were here with time capsules to save future time from collapsing because of experiments like the Philadelphia Experince. During this time I channeled information and stories. They told me that my soul was from Sirius from the beginning and that I have lived many lifetimes on earth.
A channeling I did the year 2005 entitled “Clive Barker and Enoch”
(This was one of several channeled stories I did but the rest have now been deleted)
The channeling was done by one of the leaders of all that was visiting me. After some time this leader and some of his friends formed a sort of “group” that was almost always with me. They were a group of 7-8 but was later during the last years only 4-5. This was also when I formed a form of “relationship” with these “spiritual teachers” in the form of jokes and different spiritual experiences. There was also different kinds of spirits with me. There was one spirit that was more kinder that stayed for several years. One of them even called himself a Djinn. During this time the alien calling himself “Zeta” (from Zeta Reticuli) was also with me 24 hours a day (and he loved watching television with me). There were lots of jokes during this time. This was the more positive side of this relationship because the assaults was still continuing. I had lots of voices still in my head and every week I experienced sexual assaults with rages still occuring. After many years a grow very tired of them visiting me and lots of my anger turned towards them (especially the head of them) but they were always “cheering” me up with jokes. They were very intrusive and didnt want to leave me. The last years they were not so many in my head because I got very tired of being visited by them because of all the voices. During the first years I must have had 30-40 visits by different kinds (masters, spirits, aliens, Djinns etc). They all had very strong personalities and it was easy to know who each one of them were.
During the last years I bought some technology from Russia.
A generator that was supposed to help against voices in the head. Did it help? Yes and no. The first 6 month of wearing this tech I experienced a big relief. The voices decreased and I got healed up mentally and emotional for awhile. That is when things turned bad again becasue the pressure that I was under increased again. After a year I decided to buy an upgraded model of these generators. This one was much stronger. It broke some of the voices and especially the images that was in my head. This was fascinating to experience because I could see the generators force breaking the images in my head that were not natural. This was also when my visitors found it difficult to come to close to me but they were still there around me. Things then got worse again. I experienced this as a form of intense pressure against my head like a strong force that caused me to pass out at times. One morning I passed out and found myself lying on the floor shaking. It was like the connection to my visitors was increasing and it was like a strong force trying to break through the generators forcefield. This caused me to almost pass out regularly.
I finally ended up praying Christian prayers and I got some help being free and alot of answers. There were no spiritual masters around me. There were no aliens from other planets. There were no spaceships and no visitors from Sirius. What I had in my head and around me for all these years were Djinns and different kinds of spirits. There were mostly Djinns around me and a kind of spirits called “time beings”. I also had a few other kinds of spirits that were different in apperence then the Djinns. The first Djinn that came into my life called “Johannes” came from the book. They all came from the book and were under orders to “play this theatre” for me. They were lying to me alot and it was all a kind of disguise for another kind of purpose that was for slavery and a spiritual transformation. I had sex slave commands put into my mind reaching down in to my deeper levels of the subconcousness. This was for me to become a slave (sex slave) but this was not something that I was aware of on a conscious level. I was not supposed to be aware of these instructions. It was all about mindcontrol and all of the sexual excitement and forced masturbation was all connected to this. This is also where the torture was connected. Was this all designed to break me? Was I supposed to break and say yes to becoming a slave. This is the part where I resisted and never broke. This also resulted in that I became more and more punished. I had different kinds of punishments in my mind that resulted in several schizofrenic voices and images that tormented me day and night. But I never broke. The first years I had no Djinns in my head and the torture was worse. After they came into my mind the assaults continued (but less) and it all seemed to have an even larger purpose then simply becoming a sexslave. The Djinns in my head were never evil or showed any hostility. Everything bad they did was never told to me and they did alot with my mind that was never revealed to me. They were kind to me and did lots of jokes but at the same time they placed parts in my mind that were changing me and transforming me. To me Djinns are not what people think they are. They are often refurred to as “demons” with very ugly looking apperences that are very evil in their intent. This is an image from hollywood that we are used to. To me the Djinns are more like cartoons and even like Smurfs in their apperance. Their humor is just like the cartoons and they have very different personalities. When they communicated to me they sent images into my mind that did not reveal their real look, but one of them was calling himself “Djinn Djinn” (telling me that he was an actual Djinn) and showed an image of himself of how he looked. This was in the beginning when they arrived. The Djinns came from the book. They followed orders from the book and they were given instructions on how to lie to me. This is something I am very sure of. They follow orders from higher up in the spirit world. This is from what I believe is some sort of spiritual hierarchy. This also leads me to believe that the Djinns are not actually evil at all but a spiritual kind of good entities created by God just as us humans. They have become evil and vicious because of slavery, lies, opression from a spiritual hierarchy that is also enslaving us humans. They followed orders to enslave me from “black magicians” from the book. They do not work on me and my mind for their own sake and they (the lower grades) are not even aware that they are also working for a higher spiritual Principality. They Djinns told me lots of lies. But they were also telling me things I believe is the truth. The channeled story I did could be a mix of truth (Djinn stories) and modern lies. I can not know for real. The Djinn that channeled the story was what is called a Warlock Djinn. He was in charge of the group in my head but took orders from higher up in the Djinn hierarchy. They told me lots of stories about alien life and other planets. Nothing of this was true. They talked about planets from sirius starsystems, masters from Jupiter, spaceships, draconians and there was one time I was visited by Sasquatches that could teleport long distances. It was all varius Djinns that pretended and did lots of theatres in my head. I see these types of lies going on in lots of different New Age channelings around the world. There are so much lies and false information going around out there that give you a false view of the real spiritual planes that are really existing around us. What I see when I study the different New Age groups, theosophy, esoteric, freemasons etc is that it all seems to be organised with a top hierarchy. This physical hiearchy is also connected to this spiritual hierachy. This is where all the lies come from. I have witnessed this for my self. The book I read uses the same terminology as other books around the world and the spirits lies also comes from the book. Can spirits tell the truth? Yes I believe so but not when they are under orders from higher ups in this spiriual hierachy.
What was this spiritual tranformation?
Was this all about being a sex slave? No. This tranformation was something much bigger but it is difficult for me to understand it all because of the voices in the head that spoke one thing and could mean something else in the end. It was all deception. All the rage and psychic assault was to make me into something wich goals were hidden from me. I felt I became like an emotionless robot except for the rage that was working up inside me. Everything about this rage and psychic assault was connecting to a Principality. This Principality was a fire spirit. It was transforming me inte something that was half spirit. A halfbreed. It was tranforming my mind and the rage was connected to the mind. I was also connected to Hades. I was in bondage to Hades. I was in bondage to the pit. My soul was taken and some soul essence was taken to the pit. This soul essence was in turn connecting from the pit to a timewheel that I was connected to with my mind. This fire spirit was using magick from the pit and this magick was used for the timewheel. This wheel was also handled by the spirits around me. I was connected to 6 other persons around me that was also in the wheel. These connections was from my head and throat and was to one person infront of me and one in the middle and on in the back. One spinn of this wheel was like 3 months in the physical world. This wheel created a vortex that had a negative effect on the minds around me. Like a water whirlpool that sucked everything around it towards it centre. This had the effect that all minds around followed the wheel to some extent. What happens to a mind that cannot go in the direction it chooses? Does it loose its path? It was not just me that was in these wheels but they are everywhere and they cover large areas in the hundreds. I think this wheel was causing me to be isolated from other people. With this I mean that it felt like I was not being able to leave to a new place and meet new people. Like I was bound and all the doors around me were closed. Like some magic around me prevented me from taking a new path to a different future. This is just how it felt for me. I was also connected to the Djinn world by a connection in the back of my neck. This is where the magic enters the mind. I also had internal smaller Djinns inside my head and heart. All this time I was not aware of them. I also had crystals in the brain. The voices in the head were very confusing. It was obvoius that I was not supposed to understand what was happening inside of me. They were done in layers going down further into my subconsciousness until I was not even hearing them on a conscious level. The voices was connecting to this inner transformation and I was also hit by subliminals causing opression and rage inside me. Would I have been possessed if I had never read this book? Did I open up to being possessed by consenting to what was in the book? I dont know. What I do know is that there were no way out. This book teaches that our soul is in the head and is our consciousness and only through a living master can we (our soul) return to God. My experience shows something else. The soul is not in the head but resides in the heart area. My soul was stolen from me and used by the spirits for magic.